A Journey Ever Onward

Sometimes, I consider what it would be like to live in a world without war. Just imagine it. No war. No greed for money or power. No fighting over natural resources. The entire human race collaborating on something much more important.


Think about it. The only way we're ever going to advance as a society is to accept that we are all human. Everybody is different. Some people are white, some people are black. Some people are short, some people are tall. Some people are overweight, some people are underweight. Some are gay, some are straight. Some are in between. But we are all human. Every single one of us on this planet is equal in our own right and we all need to learn to accept that.


We don't need to fight over money, power, land... because once we take the next big leap and venture into the depths of the universe, that will all become futile. The leaders of a country rule the land for but the blink of an eye on a "tiny mote of dust" in respect to the universe. Money? Well that's only good around here isn't it. If we do ever encounter intelligent life elsewhere, what good is our money - especially the notes? Some pulp from wood with a face of a species they don't recognise and symbols they don't understand written all over it. (Understandably, the coins may be a bit more valuable, but still containing symbols they won't understand)


People need to wake up and look at the bigger picture. Nobody on this planet is perfect. Nobody. Not even you, not even I. Well maybe I... The only way we're ever going to achieve greatness as a species is to work together. All of this fight over money and resources is worthless if we want to build enormous space shuttles. We don't need one human giving another human some money so that the second human can give the first human some resources. This planet belongs to us all. The resources belong to all of us.


It saddens me to think that, in my lifetime, this may never become a reality. The human race is still in its infancy and, evidently, getting more and more stupid. I guess for now, this ambition of greatness, is nothing but a dream.

"Pale Blue Dot"

Earth, seen from Voyager 1, 6 billion kilometres away.

Wanted: Focus

As the year ticks quickly onward, I find myself realising that we've made little, or next to no progress on game development. Primarily due to the fact that the majority of the year passed so far was spent on full time education. However, summer break is now upon us and I have more time to dedicate myself to releasing a game as soon as humanly possible.


BUTTTT there's a problem. Through college, I spent time procrastinating by working on games, programming, researching sciencey stuff, anything to get away from actually doing my work. Now I have my results, and I no longer need to do any college work, I'm drained. I can't find my buzz to work on games. That's not to say I don't enjoy it, I most certainly do enjoy it. I just can't find the motivation to push me forward. Waking up late in the morning has led me to being stupidly tired at night and I'm no longer able to stay up until sunrise like I used to do - which is an inconvenience since I work best alone at night.


It has always been a problem with me. I can never finish what I start. I've started many games, and finished very few. I've started to read many books, and finished very few. I've started working on many games, and finished very none. Well that's a lie. I've made simple games, but the Marshmallow Zombies team needs dedicated offices with a set up to help me focus on what I'm doing. Sitting at home with a bed close at hand and the ever-increasing distraction of the wonderful Interwebs is not a good recipe for working. Ever.


I'm not even bothered to finish this blog post but you're reading it which is a sign that I can at least have the energy to hit Publish. It draws me in with it's orange glow. Urging me to publicly roll out the post in the middle of a sent-

A New Chapter

So it would seem that college is now over, and I'm about to start a whole new chapter on my life. When my results came through, I realised they weren't the greatest - but they were sufficient enough for me to enter university. Now I only depend on my English resit results. I would imagine I did rather well seeing as I'm capable of writing long blog posts on a somewhat regular basis. The key difference is, however, that these blog posts are freely written and I take a couple of hours to write and perfect it. I can even save it as a draft and come back to it later when I'm less writer-blocked (is that a word? I'll go with it). Examinations... yeah they aren't the same. Controlled conditions, predetermined topics, set time limit - these are things I don't work well under. I struggle to write descriptive text if it's not something I choose to write about, or something I enjoy.


I've thought long and hard about it, and I've decided that if I am to fail my English again, I won't be resitting. I will happily live my life going into work, and developing games in my spare time as I always have. I do have 5 GCSEs at C or above, and evidently I now have A-Levels; it should sustain my life.


As a side-note: I find the whole system of qualifications ridiculous. Companies don't care what you know, they care what GCSEs and degrees you have. You could have the greatest self-taught skills around, but if you don't have a piece a paper to say so you can't do shit - and companies think you don't know a thing. It's an absolutely absurd system, especially when you realise that what they teach you in schools is no where close to the facts.


But anyway, enough about my opinions. I'm quite content with the time I've spent in college. I've met some great people, some of which are now good friends. I've learned how to solve Rubik's cube*. I've learned how to build my own computers. I've strengthened my confidence, and I've expanded my knowledge. In my eyes, even if I do fail my English, my time there has not been wasted.


*I did not accidentally my grammar. The guy who invented it was named Ernő Rubik. To say "a Rubik's cube" is the equivalent of me inventing a light bulb and going "an Oliver's bulb" - which is just nonsensical.

A Man of Science

My family isn't religious, but when I was a child I believed in God. I don't blame any individual, I blame the government indoctrinating children with religion. It's the schools, you see. I was never taught that these spiritual beliefs were merely that - a belief. I was raised to think that what was in the bible is true. A man named Noah built an ark, the story of creation is accurate, a man named Jesus was the son of God. I was taught that these were all true. And - being a child - I believed it. Teachers are a figure of authority so you're brainwashed into believing anything they say. I find this simply immoral.

Hooray for the only worthwhile religious holiday!

Through juniors, I didn't practice any religious ceremonies. I was pretty agnostic about the whole god thing. It didn't affect my life drastically to worry about it, so I didn't. But when I was 10 or 11, I began to feel conscious about what I believed. I prayed (yes. I prayed.) for some sign that a God was watching over. I started to fear about the possibility that, if I purposely stopped believing, I would land up in Hell. And what would happen to me after I die? I carried this on for a couple of years, praying for some sort of sign - some proof that someone or something was out there. Nothing came, nothing happened. I started to lack belief in God, since he lacked providing me with proof he existed. From about 13 years old, I knew I was an atheist. Proudly so, might I add.

Looking at pictures of the universe is better than porn.

For the past 2 years, my interest in science has grown dramatically. I've opened my eyes to the universe and its wonders. I mean, just look at the grand cosmic scale of things. Billions upon billions of galaxies, home to billions upon billions of stars, each with a chance of orbiting planets, and many of those with the possibility of life. And if you're lucky, intelligent life at that. To think we are the only civilization in this universe is selfish. It's absolutely crazy to think that. And when you start to see the universe in perspective, it's absolutely ridiculous to think that a god created the world just for us, and that his son magically happens to spawn as a human, landing on Earth. Countless worlds out there, and he comes to Earth? We are magnificently insignificant. In my opinion, following any iron age beliefs shows that you are insecure. You didn't exist before you were born, why is after-death so different? You'll simply cease to exist again, forever.

I was asked, what enlightenment do I get out of being an atheist? Why do I live to die? My response is: I could ask you the same thing. Why do you live to die? You follow a book, believing in a god, hoping to get a reward at the end of it all. When what you should be doing is living for this life, living for today. Living the one life that you know you're gonna get - for yourself!

"Space isn't remote at all. It's only an hour's drive away if your car could go straight upwards."

Most every night, I look up at the stars in the sky. I realize that these are all other "suns" and galaxies. Other planets. Other worlds. The enlightenment I get from science comes from the fact that I am extremely grateful for my existence. My short, 80-year-on-average, existence. I won't be wasting my life, and I'm happy to be here on this ocean planet for but the blink of an eye, in the perspective of the cosmos.

TL;DR: Religion sucks. I love Science.

PS: I was going to leave you with an interesting thought, but I completely forgot it.

PPS: To any god-believers out there, don't complain about this post. You are free to comment, and debate, but you are not free to complain about the post itself. If your only purpose is to shout "THIS IS ALL OFFENSIVE", you can $@%! off.

PPPS: I blabber. Science <3

I'm back!

College work has gotten in the way lately, but I'm pleased to announce I'm now back in a position where I can carry on working and blogging ^_^
I'll be sure to let you know when I have a beta to release for my game. In the meantime, our co-founder (David Smith) is close to a beta for his project. I'll be sure to post when it's ready.

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How I came to learn everything I know today

I find it fascinating - almost mind-blowing - thinking about the genesis of my knowledge in computers.

When I was younger, I was fascinated by Habbo Hotel (yes, you read correctly. Habbo Hotel!) I loved the idea of going online and meeting new people.

One day, the server for Habbo Hotel went down and I was really looking forward to playing, so I browsed Google for online chat 2D/3D services where I could control an avatar on the screen and I came across Active Worlds (AW) (a 3D chat-build program consisting of different "worlds" where you can meet people and build structures from simple prefabricated objects.)

AW literally look my life; I would play for weeks, even months, on end. I was truly amazed by what I could do in it. There was even a leading RPG world named Mutation (where players had to complete quests to obtain crystals which you would place on the altar in order to reach the boss and fight him with other players) which, for a while, was the only world I would enter.

During my time in AW, I met a man who went by the alias Pineriver. He was the owner of an static-image-based TV station in AW that was powered by rotating images on a timer written in PHP. For a trial run, he let me record a news segment for his station. I seemingly did rather well, since he hired me. Pineriver is probably the man responsible for me knowing the majority of things I know now. He taught me how to use After Effects for video editing and he taught me PHP. He taught me some pretty neat tips and tricks for Windows.

I also met a Dutch person (whose alias I won't mention because it's actually his real name), who taught me Visual Basic. He taught me how to write bots using the AW SDK, and how to make them interact with real users in-world. Making my own projects in VB, I learned the fundamentals of GUI design and networking. From there I went on to learn C#, and to this day, C++.

It's funny to think that there's some form of chain reaction that controls my entire life. One small mishap led to me learning as much as I can about computers. I've sampled everything: Video editing, web design, application development, you name it. But the one thing that stole my heart above all else was Games programming. Actually creating your own material; watching people be amazed at what you made. Making normal programs is not really an achievement, since it's just some buttons on a window controlling some actions - but if you can develop a full 3D game, be it on your own or with a group, that's an achievement. The time it takes to create something that big shows your true dedication to it. The sense of pride you get knowing that that top selling #1 title was your idea, your creation.

And THAT, ladies and gentlemen is how I came to learn everything I know today. Beautiful, isn't it?

TL;DR: If Habbo Hotel didn't go down that one day, I wouldn't know what I know now. I wouldn't be where I am now. I wouldn't be here writing this, expressing my fascination in games and programming.

Damn you, Elder Scrolls!

So ever since 11/11, I've lost my development crew for Marshmallow Zombies to Skyrim. The design doc for our MMO has been left untouched for 3 days - not good news.

I bet by the time they're finished we'll have lost all motivation to finish, but there we go.

Come Christmas, I'll have the game! Hopefully...

Then you must all wait for me! Deal with it :3